I can’t believe it’s been 2 years since we lost you.  The pain is so sharp at times it feels like it was only yesterday.  After dreaming about what you would look like, and how amazing it will be to have a little girl in such a male dominated family-it feels so foreign to think that my first experience as a mom here on earth won’t be to a tiny precious baby girl, but maybe to a baby boy instead.  In some ways it preserves all of those memories for only you, in others it makes me miss you even more.

Ava I carry your heart with me, I carry it in my heart.

Anywhere I go you go, my dear.