Someone one get me one of these…

Because I have no idea how the hell I am going to get through the next 60 hours of my life staring at these effing pee sticks willing them to look darker every day while bleeding (AGAIN!!!) for the next 3 days without the ability to use alcohol or xanax.

Here, you try…see any difference in the stupid sticks over last three days??

And when I say difference-I mean monumental difference-IF he is healthy and a take home baby, we are supposed to be at the stage where we are doubling from 416  hcg every 48 hours-which means these shouldn’t be subtle jumps anymore-we are talking hundreds or thousands of points difference in 48 hours-these pee sticks aren’t showing that at all.

I am not reassured.

I am panicked.