After seeing these today…

I went ahead (despite everything in me saying I shouldn’t do this) and canceled my 7am and 8am clients tomorrow morning so that I can have my beta drawn first thing in the am so that I can get another look at our doubling time  before thanksgiving as Monday just seemed SO. FAR. AWAY!!!

I am afraid of getting my hopes up-and the longer I go without being able to associate a beta number with the pee stick line-the more dangerous this could be on my heart.  For each day I remain pregnant with a steadily increasing in intensity pee stick line, the more this little guy becomes real.  The more real he is, the more crushing this is going to be if I don’t get to keep him either.