since I started this blog.

It was with the secret hope that not long after I entered my first post about Ava, that I would be creating exciting posts for you about a growing healthy fiscabean-instead I’ve been rage posting and telling you nothing but sad, sad shit for 365 days.

Trust me, these posts pain me to write and I’m more sick of my sad state of affairs than I can even express.  Today, because I simply woke up to a heavy, sad heart I decided it was ok not to go to work and put on my big ol faker face and play the charade of the “happy gym jester” and instead I worked on Ava’s garden.

I pray daily hourly for change.  I want need the next 365 days worth of posts to be about the exciting happiness of the growing healthy fiscabean that we deserve, not more shit.  No one deserves this much shit-and well  if I have to be honest, I especially feel that I don’t deserve this much shit.

So please, for the love of my sanity (and my really broken heart) no more shit!