verb \ˈhōp\

hoped, hop·ing

Definition of HOPE

1: to cherish a desire with anticipation
2: to desire with expectation of obtainment
3: to expect with confidence : trust

Ever have that moment when you realize you just don’t have any more hope left inside you?   Especially when you had noticed that your hope reserves were running dangerously low from using your hope all willy nilly for the past 2 and a half years so you decided to clamp down on the usage of hope.  After noticing that you were almost empty, you begin only dipping into the hope supply when it was really warranted and making sure to take every precautionary measure to ensure that you didn’t waste all of your allotted hope on something that wasn’t worthy of hope.

Well I have no worries about that anymore, because one can not ration what one does not have.  I came to the sad, stark realization when I finally saw 2 lines (twice last cycle), and I looked at them and tried to conjure up that feeling of hope as I scrummaged around in the deep recesses of my heart and brain and even checked in the cracks to see if some slipped in there-and that’s when I realized– nope, there simply is no hope left in here.

I can hold Hope in my hand, but no longer in my heart.

That is the saddest part.