We still have no idea why it is taking so long for me to get knocked up.

Every single diagnostic test to date has shown nothing that should prevent us from being able to conceive a child.  And yet, it took 9 months to get pregnant last year, and now 7 months after losing that pregnancy we are still not pregnant.

Today’s HSG showed that my uterus is a normal shape and you could clearly see the liquid flow into the uterus and then through both fallopian tubes and spill out the ends with no resistance.

Anatomically there is no reason.

My husband has Supersperm so that isn’t the reason.

I ovulate every month, and those eggs can get to the uterus so that isn’t the reason.

We even put all of the Supersperm inside the uterus to help them find that egg just in case they were getting lost on their journey, and that wasn’t the reason.

I don’t know if I should feel relieved that we have passed every possible test of our fertility, or freaked out because they can’t find anything wrong so there is nothing to “fix” to help us get pregnant.  It would be really great if we could just get pregnant already so that we can finally move on to the real freaking out that awaits us in this journey.

It is the same feeling I used to have when I was a child and I had done something wrong and my mom would say-“you go stand in the corner and just wait till your father gets home.”

So here I am, standing in the corner, waiting for the shit storm which gives me ample time to ponder how many more months I will have to be standing here WAITING, and just how bad is that shit storm going to be.